Writing sample T2

This is a writing sample from term 2 week 10.
TITLE HERE Waitomo Caves.

Dull as it may seem, the limestone was mesmerising. The way the dull brown is shown is  a piece of art; with depth and perspective to add variety to what would otherwise be boring. Constantly, drops of water fell around our group, strangers in a strange land. How long have we been here? An hour maybe, I'd say more. My feet would normally hurt by this point, but now in the ominous, elder rich-like cave, it feels trivial. “Ahead is another cave curtain, this one even larger.” Our guide told us, as the track rounded another corner. The caves went on forever, but I knew we were getting somewhere.

Boredom is lost in the immersion the caves provided, though I don’t know if anyone could be bored in such a place regardless. We reached the next metal balcony, looking over a deep ravine in the rock. Water was below, but  it was too dark to see it. “Here is the passage of the Waitomo river that formed these caves. It still flows and scores deeper and  creates more caves to unearth.” So said our guide. Moving on, we reached another marvel of nature, though it was now familiar to us. The sheets of rock that formed over thousands of years on either side of the metal track; as we passed, water still flowed, increasing the size and grandeur of the cavern.

As we walked through the passage, we rounded a corner and saw something odd. A large metal pipe sticking out of the dull yellow-brown roof. It seemed out of place surrounded by the contrasting metal walkway and irregular stone walls. “When building this area, the builders had to get a lot of concrete down, they used that pipe, looked in and saw something odd, and guessed what it was”. The guide stated, attempting to form a sense of mystery. But memories of my sister's trip guided me to the pipe, and looking upon what I knew to be the sky, but so high it made it look like a gem. It was hard to remind yourself just how deep we are.

Finally, the guide took us to an end of the road lookout, over the single most beautiful thing I've ever seen. A vast cavern floored with stalagmites and water shining in between, highlighting the pillars and spires of stone in a certain grace that I have never seen before. Like what an artist would dream of, or a builder would aspire to create. All by virtue of extreme luck. The telltale dripping sound tells me the place is still in formation; making me want to aspire to make such a thing as that. Our guide told us it was called the prettys, such a name could not bring justice to what I saw.

Upon leaving the cave, where so many things I saw made me reconsider what I know, I felt more touched than any art ever captured by a human hand. Nothing will ever do it justice, and would be a simple counterfeit of the real thing. One quote echoed in my head as I walked the paths I had tread before. “It doesn’t have to have a reason to be.”

And here is the marking for the piece. I scored level 6b.

I am quite happy with this report, my next focus focus is going to be structure, creating a deep link in between the paragraphs for the optimal piece.